So, I don't receive much spam (until recently, when my band's e-mail address got circulated into the deepest darkest depths of cyber hell), so I'm not really up on what the hip spammers are touting these days.
But I received this one and opened it (it had no attachments, and looked as if it was from a client) -- something I normally don't do. I'm still not clear on what it is they're trying to say. See if this seems like machine translation to you:
Sir/Madam,
Your current position has been evaluated to the important groups, and upon conscientious contemplation, we are able to extend to you the next offer.
Based upon conscientious contemplation you certify to achieve a princely gain on your initial property investment.
By completing the next attached form in a timely manner we will be able to complete our assessment, and we feel firm you will acheive not only a lowered rate of interest, but also a cash return that will fulfill all your holiday needs and more!
Please go here to complete this juncture of the treaty.
With warmest regards,
Lois Kimball
Should you prefer not to take gain of this holiday offer you can go here.
I can only hope that my next interviewer regards my résumé with such conscientious contemplation.
